These days have been hectic enough to keep me away from the blog. However, I just got a few minutes when I was able to consciously meditate. I take deep breaths and visualize on a daily basis, every time I can do it, but I wasn't able to fully meditate until now.
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| "Seems like helping others is easier/more important that helping ourselves." Photo by Shiva Smyth. |
It's not a secret I'm not the most organized person here. I struggle. every. single. day. to keep up with everything I want and have to do. I'm still figuring out how to do it, but as much as I love writing, working my blogs, and everything else I do, I've neglected my mental, emotional, and spiritual health to a point where I can't do it anymore.
That's not me being over-dramatic, but me being honest about the need to be cautious. I don't need to wait until I deteriorate more so I can make changes. I know the way I've been doing things is not for the best, and that's the reason why I took the chance now that I could to go back to basics.
I think this is something that happens a lot to some of us. "Real life" gets so hard to keep up with, so many responsibilities, too much stress, and before we know it we forget that the foundation of our practice are several simple things. Visualization, breathing, meditation, offerings, praying, maybe more, maybe less. But we forget all the same.
Not long ago, I was finally able to start going to therapy. My mental health is so much better now that there's not a being in this world or another one that can make me stop going. One of the things that surprised me was that this therapist helped me reconnect with meditation and visualization. I've done it in every session, he guiding me how to do it, and I've wanted to do it on my own.
I said before that being a healer is part of my identity as a Witch, which is ironic considering this whole entry. Seems like it's so easy to help others heal themselves, but when it's about us, about me, it's harder. We keep putting it aside thinking we'll be fine, find a better time and space. Seems like helping others is easier/more important that helping ourselves.
It maybe hasn't happened to you, but it sure has to me. I find it so easy to find the right words, the right gestures, the right energy, the right kind of help, when it's about family, friends, sometimes even strangers. However, when it's about me, things get harder. Because I know how tricky and spoiled I can be, because I know how superficial, selfish, egotistical, and immature I can get.
And because I know all of this, and I've thought about it, and I've seen a small change with a small meditation, I decide to find at least five minutes for me every day as I used to do before, years before, when things were hectic as well but meditation kept me afloat.
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